Being

I look to the stars and imagine a time before science. I imagine their light shining from within, so pure that their beauty lights up the darkness. Their light reaches out, not built up or torn down by the act of living. They shine on everything and everyone – no matter what they receive from others. I think of myself and my children - and strive to be as real as the air, as bright as the sun; simply by being who we are.

I look at the river as it flows, like blood through veins – the water moves with the rhythm of life. I sit at its edge and submerge my legs. A force of nature moving in and around me, reminding me of the power of balance. I think of myself and my children – and strive for harmonious health. Not from the bandaids we have made, but from the water and resources that were put in place before we were even born.

I look at a flower and see its beauty. I wonder if I can get myself to remember a time where flowers had no name and we had no idea what a seed would become. I let myself feel the emotions in its presence. Peace, admiration, connected yet alone. And as I move my gaze to the tree – I release all that I felt for the flower so that I can appreciate the tree as it is. I think of myself and my children – and strive to never define them. I make sure not to pick them up – when they are blossoming just fine on their own. I allow myself to break open like a seed no matter how deeply I am buried.

I look to the fire as it burns. I watch as it dances, creates and destroys. I see it as something more alive than we’ve imagined. Its constant sparking as it is molded by its surroundings and experiences. A chemical reaction that causes combustion, heat and smoke. I think of myself and children – and strive for understanding. I seek and assemble the kindling needed to build my beliefs. The creation in learning and destruction of letting go, like a fire all my own. I aspire to create a fire pit for my children. A safe place for them to build their own fires. And respectfully admire them even when their fire appears different than my own.

Who are we? A Spirit inside a body, with emotions to experience life and a mind to understand it. Can we be aware of all these ingretients that make up, the Self? Can we visit each area daily and do our best to be true to who we are? So many of us get wrapped up in Spirit, fixated on our bodies, stuck in our emotions or lost in our thoughts. I myself am guilty of losing myself from time to time... arent we all?

I'm wondering if becoming Self aware is enough to pull it back together and move forward.

I’m wondering if we can at least try so that we are whole and healthier version of ourselves.

I have faith that our children will learn the same balance just by growing in the presence of our trying.

Find your way ~ Jess